depuss's Couch
by depuss




Rating: and a Swish of a Tail

School is back in session and autumn is upon us once more. A good time to kick back with a good book.

This month’s selection is It’s Not About The Whip, Love, Sex and Spirituality in the BDSM Scene by Sensuous Sadie. Now considering that in the past I’ve been a little dubious about people who publish “how to” books on their own, I was surprised and delighted when I began reading this tome. Sensuous Sadie tells it as she sees it, telling readers her perception of the scene as seen through her eyes. She doesn’t get in your face and say “this is the way it HAS to be” but relates her experiences in this lifestyle in a style that makes you think that she’s sitting across the kitchen table from you over a cup of java. The book is actually a compilation of columns that Sadie has written through the years. Sensuous Sadie is a switch who is a columnist and edits SCENEsubmissions, an online newsletter, and founded Rose & Thorn, Vermont’s first BDSM group in 1999 and led the group until 2002 when she passed the leadership baton onto the current director. A lot of her stories made me stop and think about things that had occurred in my own life, in and out of e scene, and had me taking a second look at how they did or did not affect me. Insightful… funny at times… and forthright. That’s Sensuous Sadie.

She talks about everything from her first attempt at BDSM to the spiritual side of this lifestyle as well as insight into what it is that we do. She writes about how the scene and community have changed over the years and about how some people think, as she puts it, she’s “full-o-Hooey”! That, I think, is why I like this book so much. She tells it like she sees it and if someone doesn’t agree with her, oh well. “….I believe that no one has to justify their right to self expression….” I think that says it all; especially in this arena where there are so many different ways and views as to what IS BDSM. Sensuous Sadie writes about her beliefs and I think once you read this book you’ll agree that it’s well worth it.

Here’s what other’s are saying about It’s Not About The Whip:

  • With her generous spirit and questing intelligence, Sadie isn't satisfied merely to have been there and done that - she needs to find out what it all means. Her insights will help speed many others along on their own journeys toward sexual self-revelation.
    ~ Gary Switch, Contributing Editor, Prometheus
  • It is evident that Sadie's writing comes from the heart of someone in the D/s lifestyle. It's nice for a change to have someone with experience in what they write.
    ~ Angel Babee, Leader of Sisters in Submission
  • Your writing voice is clear without being strident and the breezy tone helps keep the "sturm und drang" out of what is surely a subject filled with a bit too much of that. Most of what I read on the web is so hopelessly cloying, overdone or just plain bad, so this a refreshing counterpoint.
    ~ Anne Marie Delaney

This puddin’ tat gives four paws and a wave of a tail to Sensuous Sadie and It’s Not About The Whip!