One
way of thinking about whipping is as another way of touching someone.
People who are just getting into SM frequently play with spanking;
it's fun to be spanked! It's a punishment, it's a strong stimulus,
it hurts very pleasurably. But if you've ever spanked anyone for
a long time you know that your spanking hand wears out quickly!
Well,
that's what whips are for--to allow you to hit someone for a longer
time, without tiring out. There are many varieties of whips (cat-o-nine
tails, heavy floggers, canes, light braided switches, suede pussy
whips, and on and on), all of which feel very different and which
have their own individual effect. A whip-loving top will often
carry a veritable arsenal of different floggers, but they are
all extensions of the top's touch. Indeed, when I whip or cane
someone, I feel as though I _am_ touching them--as though the
instrument is an extension of my arm and my desire.
There
are deeper reasons why the variety is so diverse. A whipping scene
will often start off very lightly, with the top using a small
whip to sensitize the bottom and get them into the rhythm of the
scene, switching to heavier and heavier whips as the bottom gets
deeper and deeper, more and more receptive to additional sensation.
Of course, the top may choose to lead the bottom on any kind of
tactile journey the top desires--switching from stinging light
switches to biting canes to soft fleeces. (Yes, it can feel GREAT
when your top stops hitting you and suddenly brushes a velvet
cloth against your back! Or maybe an ice cube....) It's all about
physical sensation.
Quite
often people in the scene describe whips as being "thuddy"
or "stingy". Thuddy whips land with a solid impact;
they shove you, they feel like a cross between a hug and a punch.
Stingy whips land with a bite; they feel like a cross between
a scratch and a slap. Both kinds of sensation are enjoyable in
different ways, and a skilled top can alternate thud and sting
(and then some!) to create waves of sensation that wash their
bottom into ecstasy.
Most
people enjoy a slow buildup when being whipped. This can culminate
in an explosive climax of impacts, leaving both top and bottom
drained and delighted. Or it can wind down gently, ending casually.
Or it can stop feeling good suddenly, resulting in a safweord.
Or it can turn into a galloping intense sex scene! But the general
"start slow, build up, end intensely" tempo is common
to many SM scenes: from gentle to stronger to WOW and then back
to gentle, then a little stronger, then WOW!!... and gentle again.
It's the motion of the ocean, as they say. It takes practice to
know how to use this to blow your bottom's mind, but the more
you learn, the more skilled you will be, and believe me, these
skills-- teasing your partner and making them feel better and
better and BETTER --are very useful in non-SM contexts as well!
Whips
aren't the end of the story. Some people use paddles--of leather
or wood, sometimes with holes cut in them to decrease air resistance
and make for a harder impact. Paddles produce a solid "smack!"
which can feel like a super-powerful spanking. Some players like
canes, which can be thick or thin, stiff or relatively flexible.
Canes can produce some of the strongest impacts of all--the "whick!"
of a quick-moving cane is distinctive. Not everyone can handle
the intensely focused pain canes can produce, but those who can
tend to greatly enjoy it. Wooden spoons and kitchen spatulas have
been pressed into service as instruments of flagellation. For
a while, Nerf bats were very popular in some San Francisco parties
I went to. (Bonk!) If none of this makes any sense to you, well,
if you have to ask, you might not understand.
Whipping
or spanking is sometimes used as part of a "punishment"
scene, in which the pretext for the scene is that the bottom has
been disobedient or naughty in some way which requires chastisement.
This can be fun to do as role-playing, but it may not work in
a more long-term D&S dynamic. Bottoms often find it erotic
to receive non-damaging sensation from their top--and of course
any scene causing permanent damage is not safe nor sane. If your
bottom learns that the best way to get enjoyably beaten is to
misbehave, you will have a very bad bottom on your hands. It is
often then best to separate "play" punishments--which
are intended to be fun-- from "real" punishments involving
seriously broken agreements. Here is where reality and fantasy
need to be delicately separated, and here is where the real world
differs from S&M fiction.
When
whipping someone, be careful. Heavy whipping is usually done on
the back or ass, simply because those are the parts of the body
which can take it most readily. Be careful of hitting the spine,
which can break the skin where the vertebrae come close to the
surface. Stay away from the kidneys, as kidney damage can occur
if you hit them too hard. Stay away from the neck, for the same
reasons you avoided the spine.
Be
aware that if you hit someone hard enough (which may be lighter
than you'd think) you will bruise them, and if you keep going
you can break the skin, which is decidedly unsafe sex; and leather
or string whips are tough to clean. For this reason, some dedicated
masochists have their own toys which have come in contact with
their blood, and henceforth can be used only on them. Whippings
like this are very strenuous, but as with all SM, you can start
out light and get only as heavy as you want! Bruises will heal
(even large ones), as will light cuts or abrasions, but you should
know how to avoid unintended damage that won't be so accommodating.
One
thing to watch for (a distant risk, but worth knowing): melanoma,
a form of skin cancer, can be worsened by skin trauma. If you
see a mole on your bottom's back that looks uneven, discolored,
or different than it used to, avoid that area, and have them see
a dermatologist.
There
have been posts on s.s.b-b that go into MUCH more detail about
the hows and whys of flogging. If you want to know more, post
to s.s.b-b and ask, or check out the resources. (This FAQ is not
intended to be comprehensive in every area... though it would
be nice....)