Dominant v.s. Master
by feather

I've been in several room discussions when the question posed for the topic was: What is the difference between a Dom and a Master. I most often say (in various words...due to the nature of a chatroom discussion ) a Master is defined as such, by a group of his peers, based on his knowledge, skill and application of his Mastery.

This is often met with great debate. Some saying there are no schools to "graduate from" or subbies stating their Dom is their Master, for that is what she calls him, etc.

It is difficult in a room discussion to expand upon this topic, in an manner which involves my whole intrepretation and what I base it upon, thus this posting.


For the purpose of this posting.... my disclaimer:

This posting does not have anything to do with what you choose to call a Dominant in your personal relationship.
Also, I write this from my being a real time submissive, who has engaged in and enjoys BDSM activities; therefore, I write, strictly from this aspect.

It is of my opinion,based upon my teachings from my former real life Master, my former real life Trainer and our/my friends in this lifestyle and my study over the past year, that:

1. A Dominant is a person with a dominant trait in their personality.

2. A Master is a Dominant with substantial knowledge, has practiced real time Mastership (which may or many not include BDSM experiences) and he is recognized as a Master amongst his peers.
These two areas~clearly do not mean one and the same.

Yes, a Master does possess dominant personalities. However, it does not convey that all Dominant's have earned the title of being a Master.

To further clarify the topic of Dom vs Master, I've gone to the Websters II New Riverside Dictionary, which defines some of the words we associate with this lifestyle and this posting.

Dominate: verb 1. To influence, control or rule by superior power or authority. 2. To occupy the most powerful postion in or over.

Dominant: adj. 1. Having the most control or influence.

Domineer: verb 1. To rule over arbitrarily or arrogantly: tryrrannize. 2. To be bossy or overbearing.

Master: noun 1. One with control or authority over another or others. 2. Someone of great learning, skill or ability. 3. One who teaches or mentors.

Masterful: adjective 1. Given to playing the master: domineering. 2. Having or showing mastery: expert.

Masterly: adjective 1. Having or showing the skill of a master.

Mastery: noun 1. Consummate skill or knowledge. 2. Status of a master or ruler.

Consummate: verb 1. To complete or conclude. adjective 1. Perfect. 2. Highly skilled.

Since I do not know all things in this lifestyle...I do not know if actual schools exist for one to become a Master in this lifestyle. However, I do know around the world, if one seeks, you can find workshops pertaining to this lifestyle and the various activities which may be involved in Dom/sub and/or BDSM relationships.

I know of dungeons that offer lectures and demonstra-tions of BDSM activities for those new to the lifestyle. If you are truly interested in this lifestyle, you will find what you seek.

I will always maintain that one does not become a Master, simply by tacking on the word "master" onto their name. Mastery of anything, takes time, study, dedication and practical application.

This submissive, shall not be submit to anyone who simply wishes to think they are a "Master" because they are "domineering". This one finds "domineering" to be a self-centered personality trait and has nothing to do with this actual lifestyle at all.

Most in this lifestyle, online or real life, has seen how we continually preach "Safe, Sane and Consensual."

Because of this, I will not submit to One, who is not a Master, by my interpretation and desire. Anytime I submit to my Master, my life is at stake.

If my life is at stake, due to a medical condition...do I go to a first month med student? No. I go to a doctor, who is educated, trained, with actual practical application in medicine and also known amongst his peers, as being skilled and knowlegable and capable to practice medicine.

Another analogy is:

If one reads books for a year on car repair.....does this make that person a mechanic? Would you bring your car to this person to repair the engine?

In closing I share with you two of my favorite quotes....authors unknown.


"A dom demands, a Dom teaches, a Master inspires."

"A good Teacher, remains.......teachable."

© 2003 feather aka mjwr
Protected by the copyright laws. Not to be reproduced, copied or redistributed without the express permission of the author.