May/June 2002
From a Dom's Perspective
by Dennis Burns



The burning touch of the flogger,
etches pleasur
e upon your flesh,
the wielder administers another caress,
you scream your release; emotions held no longer.
The wind from flying tails, kiss raised welts,
built-up endorphins storm through your brain,
stellar music from within vibrates a refrain,
held by thick, coarse leather belts.
Your world is black, resistance near broken…
Your wrists are shackled, ankles chained…
You are helpless as you feel your passionate desires inflamed…
Beyond the veil of lustful flame, terribly joyous words are spoken…

The weighty heft of responsibility one carries is sometimes lost in the pleasure of the moment. When one enters the realm of a Top, Dom, Master/Mistress, one sometimes forgets to see or feel the load one is bearing, because of that incredible lightness of being… being a controller of another. Many of us have learned through trial and error, (that latter word we try to ignore, but in reality can not.)

We have learned just what that responsibility is and means in our life, sometimes the hard way. That first time you took another to the brink and let them gaze into the abyss of their soul, others can tell you all about it but until you experience it, it is just puffs of air, words that have no true relevancy until you are holding that person and soothing them as you strive to bring them back. For some who will admit it, there is an element of righteous fear that accompanies that first reentry process from a deep probe into the other side of the mirror. One may even wonder why do we accept this responsibility of another’s flesh, mind and spirit within the palms of our hands. Why do we risk all that we do? Because it is who and what we are! Sounds like a pat answer, so let us explore it a bit deeper.

We are literally wired to do certain actions and to accept certain stimuli as pleasurable, painful, lustful etc. The neural pathways within our brain follow routes plotted by congenital mapping, the combinations of our experiences and the modalities or ways and means of how we learn. Somewhere in that grand scheme of mental engineering, we become hard wired in several ways, some are exclusively one way, while others in varied combinations. Some of us are wired for care taking, in other words, one sees a need in another and tries to fulfill the other’s need, either because we can or we are willing to learn how. Others are wired for self-need and seek others who are a mirrored reflection of that need, thereby fulfilling both. And some are wired to just take and if that works for the other, that’s just gravy for the dish. Yet for the latter even though it is not spoken of much, they have a sense of responsibility to their partners to some extent or they would find no one who will play with them, so shhh… even Sadists have a sense of responsibility, other wise they would be sociopathic, and that is one or two steps beyond our world.

There are even some who find they have a need, a desire to instruct another either from their own experiences in the life as a bottom, sub or slave, or just from an internal need to learn from instructing (one way to learn about something is to teach it to another.) Whatever the reason(s) that the wiring was laid down the way it was, it is just a reflection of the modality that we operate from. What is the common link, that common concept that flows through most of us? It is a sense responsibility mixed with personal code of ethics in regards to those we deal with.

According to Webster’s first definition of the word: Responsible: answerable or accountable, as for something within one’s power, control or management. That’s what is expected of us, by others and by ourselves. According to Webster’s second definition of the word: Ethics: a complex of moral precepts held or rules of conduct followed by an individual. The first definition dealt with group ethics.

We are wired to do as we do, because it gives us many things we need, not necessarily desire, for desire speaks more of wants, while need addresses a requirement. This is a requirement that compels us to be controllers of others, to be responsible for their welfare, guidance, growth and development, within the confines of a set of ethics. How each of us achieves these ends is a matter of personal requirements and a clarified personal world view. To each their own, and as always this is just my own view and not the only view. Take what you like and leave what you don’t. The following is a portion of my own personal code, which I have incorporated. It was written on the wall of a very old Dojo for swordsman!

Jinkaku no kansei ni kissuru koto
(My goal is perfection of character!)

Rei to setsu ni shushi suru koto
(I will behave with respect and discipline!)

Shingi o omonzuru koto
(I will uphold righteousness!)

Sentan-banren ni tessuru koto
(I will do my best and never give up!)

Kekki no yu ni hayaru bekarazaru koto
(I will never lose self-control!)

Take Care and be well.
Dennis “DragonDiver/Dragon~Lord” Burns

“What colour is a Dragon my son?”
“Crimson, Master, Bloody crimson, no matter what doth the eyes say”