March/April 2001
by Master Bleu & Mistress Daemone

Respect is the foundation upon which all else in this lifestyle is built and without it any relationship that you build will surely crumble in time.

Let me relate a story to you in an effort demonstrate the different levels of respect that I have seen within the bounds of this lifestyle. While attending a recent event I listened intently as one submissive told her friend that she would never call anyone Master other than the man that she submitted to. When her friend questioned her on this she stated that in her mind, the term, Master, was to be used exclusively in referring to her Master and no others. I could see that her friend did not agree with her on this subject but seemed too reserved or too unwilling to discuss it with a fairly new lifestyle member. I was asked what my opinion was and this is what I told both of those submissives.

Picture yourself standing at the foot of your Master’s bed in a hospital room. He is about to undergo some very serious surgery and you are very worried. His doctor walks into the room, checks your Master’s charts and asks both of you if you have any questions before they wheel him out. Naturally your first question would be something along the lines of “Doctor, will everything be okay?” Just as the doctor begins to speak one of his colleagues enters the room and you are introduced to him. “This is Doctor Grey,” says your doctor. “Hello Doctor” would be the normal response from just about anyone in that situation.

While Doctor Grey is not your doctor, you still referred to him as Doctor. You did so out of respect for his title not his position, as he was not your doctor. I contend that within the bounds of the lifestyle it must be made clear that the term Master is not unlike the term Doctor. Granted, this submissive was not going to submit to any Master but her own nor should she be expected to submit to anyone else. I would submit to you that calling another man Master is a term of respect for his title and calling your Master, “Master” is a term of respect for his position. Both are terms of respect.

Over the past year I have had quite a few people approach me and very respectfully ask if I were Master Bleu? This question came from submissives, Doms and Masters and Mistresses alike. Why was I getting this level of respect from people that I did not know and who did not know me personally? It all goes back to building a relationship on the firm foundation of respect. It seems that all of these people know my submissive and they see how she conducts herself in both public and private. Respect radiates from this submissive in all that she does and says within the bounds of this lifestyle. She shows respect to everyone that she comes into contact with and that respect then becomes a shining reflection of herself and of her Master. She very clearly understands the difference between title and position.

Mistress Daemone is a pleasure to watch when she is with one of her subs. It is very apparent to anyone watching that she has the full respect of the sub that is with her but also and just as important, that she returns that respect. Should you have the opportunity to attend any local or national lifestyle functions, please make it a point to watch the couples there and how they interact with each other. I think that you will find it very interesting and might gain a new perspective on the different levels of respect.

Master Bleu

R E S P E C T . . .

Yes, this is a line from one of Aretha Franklin’s hits of the 1960’s.

But it is also the foundation for most successful relationships, whether “vanilla” or our Lifestyle. As a Mistress, I demand respect from my submissives because I am a Mistress. They have come to me looking for someone who will take over their body and mind. Someone to Dominate their whole existence. Someone that will guide them through the unique, intense pleasure which comes from the freedom of giving completely and utterly to another. I have a synopsis I expect them to follow without falter and when they do blunder and stumble, whether consciously or from neglect on their part, they expect punishment and discipline. If I do not bestow this teaching upon them, they would not respect me as a Mistress. They expect it... they want it... they need it... And I will give it to them because I respect their needs.

But what is respect? How do we acquire it? Where does it come from? Webster’s dictionary says “To feel or show deferential regard for; willingness to show consideration or appreciation; polite expressions of consideration of deference.

Now I’m really confused.

Let me try and convey what I perceive RESPECT to represent. (The soft side of me) I have the sweetest little gray haired grandmother. Whenever I go visit her, her face lights up and she gives me a warm, tender hug. She may be having a very bad attack of pain from her arthritis, but she asks how I’m doing. Are things OK? How’s my job? She makes me feel as though I am the most important person in her life. I look into her face and I see pride, dignity, and self-respect. She emits a strength that could conquer any man or any situation. I admire her for all these traits, and RESPECT her for her unselfish temperament and I love her for how she makes me feel about myself.

These are the same interactions that occur between a Mistress/Master and their submissives. When you RESPECT others, you value their privacy, boundaries, independence, the right to dignity, their needs and wants and their feelings. You don’t force people to respect you. You earn their respect. RESPECT yourself and their admiration, respect and love will be a natural occurrence.

Credit to Lord Colm for the following verse:

”Each time you kneel at My feet My respect for you deepens. For in your bended knee a lifetime of struggle, doubt, and fear are overcome. Each time you speak the word, “Mistress” My respect for you is strengthened. That single utterance conveying the boundless, unselfish love that only a submissive heart can know. Each time you surrender to Me, your will, your body, your heart, you temper the links that bind us. Not iron or steel, but something far more durable. RESPECT.”

Mistress Daemone